When I asked my boyfriend to give me a “shocker,” I wasn’t expecting him to tell me that he fucked my mom.
Topic: relationships
Relationship jokes, dating disasters, marriage chaos, red flags, and emotionally questionable laughs for people who have loved, lost, and texted anyway.
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I’m NOT a nerd. It was merely a mental slip when my girlfriend
I’m NOT a nerd. It was merely a mental slip when my girlfriend said the word “dildo” and I thought she was talking about that dude in “The Hobbit.”
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I didn’t mind giving my BF a shot at Reverse Cowgirl, I just
I didn’t mind giving my BF a shot at Reverse Cowgirl, I just wish he hadn’t felt the need to brand my ass during the act.
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I’m not saying my boyfriend’s penis is small, I’m just saying I
I’m not saying my boyfriend’s penis is small, I’m just saying I should probably be able to tell the difference between fucking and acupuncture.
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Silly me. I assumed my girlfriend’s nickname of “Thunder Thighs”
Silly me. I assumed my girlfriend’s nickname of “Thunder Thighs” had something to do with their size — until I heard the rumbling noises that often emanate from near the tops of them.
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My girlfriend is all pissed off because I ruined her Mickey
My girlfriend is all pissed off because I ruined her Mickey Mouse bobblehead. I maintain that with all that alcohol in my system, it looked exactly like a butt plug.
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My girlfriend and I are trying to do every position in the Kama
My girlfriend and I are trying to do every position in the Kama Sutra, and had no problems with The Butterfly, The Bridge, The Plow, The Rowing Boat and The Suspended Scissors. However, we’ve been stuck for more than a week on The Chinese Sex Trap.
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It takes a lot of effort to inflate a new love doll, but it’s
It takes a lot of effort to inflate a new love doll, but it’s worth it. The look of wide-eyed, open-mouthed excitement when you introduce your two ladies to each other pretty much guarantees you a three-way sandwich.
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I’m not saying my girlfriend’s vibrator isn’t loud; I’m just
I’m not saying my girlfriend’s vibrator isn’t loud; I’m just saying her neighbor should know that helicopters can’t land on the roof because there’s no room up there.
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When she said was into leather and chains, I bought her a Harley
When she said was into leather and chains, I bought her a Harley riding jacket. When she said she liked watersports, I naively showed up with my snorkel. So today when she told me she had some shit to do around the house, I decided to stay away altogether, just in case.
