Topic: relationships

Relationship jokes, dating disasters, marriage chaos, red flags, and emotionally questionable laughs for people who have loved, lost, and texted anyway.

  • Eat My Ass PLS STOP

    Eat My Ass PLS STOP

    when she comes in drunk but you

    sober

    eat my ass

    PLS STOP

  • Kevin Please Stop Beatboxing

    Kevin Please Stop Beatboxing

    “Kevin I’m dying. Please stop beatboxing”

  • The Elephant Trunk

    A man goes to the doctor, absolutely desperate. He says, “Doc, I was in a horrible accident and lost my penis. I can’t live like this, you have to help me!”

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    The doctor says, “Good news, we have an experimental procedure. We take a baby elephant’s trunk, graft it on, and it works perfectly.”

    The man agrees immediately. The surgery is a success.

    Two months later, the man brings a beautiful woman home for a date. Things start heating up, and suddenly, the man feels a twitch in his pants. The trunk-penis is waking up.

    As they are sitting there, the elephant trunk unzips his fly, creeps onto the table, reaches into the breadbasket, grabs a dinner roll, and disappears back under the table.

    The woman is stunned, her eyes wide.

    “That was… amazing!” she says. “Can you do that again?”

    The guy smiles, wincing in pain, and replies, “I’d love to, but I don’t think I can fit another dinner roll up my ass!”

  • The Strip Club

    One afternoon, a child told his mother that he had visited the strip club. His mother was upset about this! “Well, did you see anything that you weren’t supposed to see?” she questioned her son.

    “Yes — I saw Dad!” he said.

  • Go Deeper But Out of Poems

    Go Deeper But Out of Poems

    When she says “go deeper” but you’ve run out of poems

  • Steal the Declaration of Independence

    Steal the Declaration of Independence

    We can steal your man

    @lordflaconegro

    Shawty in the back look like she gonna steal the Declaration of Independence

  • My Thai Artist Girlfriend’s New Art

    My Thai Artist Girlfriend’s New Art

    My thai artist girl friend just sent me her new art:

  • The Dentist

    A dentist tells his patient, “This might hurt a little bit. Are you ready?”

    The patient says, “Yes, doc. I’m ready.”

    And the dentist says, “I’m sleeping with your wife.”

  • Magic Relationship

    Wife wanted me to put the magic back into our relationship.

    But I don’t think sawing her in half was what she was thinking.

  • One Leg

    What has one leg and licks balls?

    My amputee girlfriend.