Topic: sex

Dark sex jokes, adult memes, awkward hookups, bedroom disasters, and the kind of punchlines that should probably clear their browser history afterward.

  • New Look Same Coconuts

    New Look Same Coconuts

    When you shave your balls

    NEW LOOK SAME COCONUTS

  • Eat My Ass PLS STOP

    Eat My Ass PLS STOP

    when she comes in drunk but you

    sober

    eat my ass

    PLS STOP

  • Magnifying Glass Penis Enlarger

    Magnifying Glass Penis Enlarger

    “Man buys product that promised to enlarge his penis and gets a magnifying glass”

    Homem compra produto que prometia aumentar pênis e recebe lupa

    PROCON Campina

    PREFEITURA MUNICIPAL DE CAMPINA SECRETARIA MUNICIPAL DE ASSUNTOS JURÍDICOS Departamento de Proteção ao Consumidor

    disque 151 www.procon.campina.sp.gov.br

  • Mellencamp

    Mellencamp

    When the dump is so big you accidentally give yourself a Mellencamp

    mellencamp

    To take a dump so large that the prostate is stimulated and the male ejaculates a little while taking the shit. Called a mellencamp because “it hurts so good.”

  • The Elephant Trunk

    A man goes to the doctor, absolutely desperate. He says, “Doc, I was in a horrible accident and lost my penis. I can’t live like this, you have to help me!”

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    The doctor says, “Good news, we have an experimental procedure. We take a baby elephant’s trunk, graft it on, and it works perfectly.”

    The man agrees immediately. The surgery is a success.

    Two months later, the man brings a beautiful woman home for a date. Things start heating up, and suddenly, the man feels a twitch in his pants. The trunk-penis is waking up.

    As they are sitting there, the elephant trunk unzips his fly, creeps onto the table, reaches into the breadbasket, grabs a dinner roll, and disappears back under the table.

    The woman is stunned, her eyes wide.

    “That was… amazing!” she says. “Can you do that again?”

    The guy smiles, wincing in pain, and replies, “I’d love to, but I don’t think I can fit another dinner roll up my ass!”

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  • Could You Vape Semen

    Could You Vape Semen

    r/morbidquestions u/thatcatinthecorner 14h

    Could you vape semen?

    If it was watered down to the approximate thickness of fluid, could you vape semen?

    192 60 Share

    BEST COMMENTS

    DrDank7 12h

    Great now you’re making vaping even more gay

    445

    1simis 9h

    It’s a double negative though so it cancels out

    115

    What_R_YOU_Doin_Here 6h

    I don’t think that’s how this works. If you are giving a bj and taking it in the ass at the same time, does that make you straight?

    18

    WillBeamon 6h

    Obviously

    33

  • Holy Spirit Strangling Hookers

    Holy Spirit Strangling Hookers

    “Wooooo… I am the Holy Spirit! What you are doing is a SIN!”

    “Nonsense—masturbation is healthy and natural.”

    “No, I meant strangling hookers.”

    “Oh, right. Tbat.”

  • Happy Meal for Grown Ups

    Happy Meal for Grown Ups

    IF THEY MADE A HAPPY MEAL

    BAREFOOT SWEET RED CALIFORNIA RED WINE BLEND

    Babybel

    GHIRARDELLI INTENSE DARK SEA SALT SOIREE ALMOND

    FOR GROWN UPS.

  • My Thai Artist Girlfriend’s New Art

    My Thai Artist Girlfriend’s New Art

    My thai artist girl friend just sent me her new art:

  • Handshake Alternatives: Docking

    Handshake Alternatives: Docking

    CORONAVIRUS (COVID-19) HANDSHAKE ALTERNATIVES

    THE BUMP

    THE BOW

    DOCKING

    THE FOOT TAP

    de.gov/coronavirus