Concrete evidence of Trump ties in Russia
Topic: wordplay
Wordplay jokes, memes, dark humor, awkward moments, and weird little disasters from Chaotic Meh — sharp, strange, and probably not safe to explain at brunch.
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Trumpets
John: *writes Revelations* Lord, the End is signaled by trumpets?
God: No, Trump/Pence
John: Right. Trumpets.
God: Fine. They’ll know.
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No Words to Describe How Angry I Am
I recently ordered a thesaurus online and when it arrived it was blank. I literally have no words to describe how angry I am.
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It Just Kept Ringing
I called the tinnitus hotline yesterday.
It just kept ringing.
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Making Headlines Everywhere
Did you hear about the new corduroy pillows?
They’re making headlines everywhere!
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His Mourning Coffee
What is the funeral director’s favourite drink?
He can’t start his day without his mourning coffee.
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I Can’t Wait to Rub It In
I have been diagnosed with a rare condition and my doctor prescribed me some anti-gloating cream medication.
I can’t wait to rub it in.
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Which Vowel Is the Most Important
The other day, a friend and I had this long pointless argument as to which vowel is the most important.
I won.
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Only Sustained Light Injuries
I accidentally ran into a lamp post. Thankfully, I only sustained light injuries.
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More Than Red and Blue Combined
My least favourite colour is purple.
I dislike it more than red and blue combined.
