I think that for Halloween I’ll dress as a candy bar with a sign that says “Eat Me,” then visit Overeaters and Sex Addicts support groups and see who cries more.
Delivery Style: misdirection
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This morning I was licking a delicious Tootsie Roll and thought
This morning I was licking a delicious Tootsie Roll and thought to myself, “Who cares how many licks it takes to get to the Tootsie Roll center? It’s the licking for hours I’m good at and enjoy so much.”
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I’m going to get a dog and name it MyRack. Then I can walk
I’m going to get a dog and name it MyRack. Then I can walk around the neighborhood yelling, “Has anyone seen MyRack?” and see which guys dare to answer.
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I learned two things that weekend: 1) Despite the assurances and
I learned two things that weekend: 1) Despite the assurances and insistence of my scout master, the product is not named “KY-In-Tents”; 2) The experience is nothing like what they lead you to believe from those commercials.
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I have Bieber Feber! Wait… I’m sorry, I hab a code. When I say
I have Bieber Feber! Wait… I’m sorry, I hab a code. When I say “Bieber,” I mean “bagina.”
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I really enjoy writing my Ruminations while totally naked. But
I really enjoy writing my Ruminations while totally naked. But the manager at Burger King keeps telling me it’s a health code violation.
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Last time I was in Vegas, what I *asked* for was directions to
Last time I was in Vegas, what I *asked* for was directions to the quarter slots. What I ended up with was a two-bit hooker.
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They just closed another massage parlor in my neighborhood. I
They just closed another massage parlor in my neighborhood. I guess people just aren’t coming like they used to.
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I was going to try to come up with a Rumination about my huge
I was going to try to come up with a Rumination about my huge throbbing cock, but it’s just too damn hard.
