I signed up for my company’s 401K…but I’m not sure that I can run that far.
Format: one-liner
One-liners, quick jokes, short-form comedy, and punchlines built for impatient degenerates from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Global Warming Icebreaker
If you are meeting a new group of people and don’t know what to talk about, try mentioning Global Warming.
It’s a huge Icebreaker.
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Amazon Driver Work From Home
My wife orders so much from Amazon that if I got a job as an Amazon driver they’d probably just let me work from home.
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Nature’s Way of Saying
Garage sales: nature’s way of saying, “Here, let me pay you to throw this out for me.”
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One Word or Spread Apart
Is buttcheeks one word or should I spread them apart?
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Mrs Fire
I really miss Robin Williams. He was a legend!
Without a doubt my favorite movie of his was “Mrs Fire.”
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He Was 0K
A chemist froze himself at -273.15°C, and everyone said he was crazy.
It turns out that he was 0K.
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Too Many Probing Questions
Why do aliens make such bad therapists?
They ask too many probing questions.
