The cop said I blew a 08, but *I* think it was a 10.
Delivery Style: misdirection
-
Ever notice that the root word of “penis” is “pen”? It makes
Ever notice that the root word of “penis” is “pen”? It makes sense when you think about it. Sometimes you really have to grip it hard and make a lot of tight little circles to get the ink flowing.
-
Frankly, I was a bit surprised at how pissed the hooker got when
Frankly, I was a bit surprised at how pissed the hooker got when I asked her for the WhorFax.
-
Call me a “cheap ho” all you want — I’m still not throwing in
Call me a “cheap ho” all you want — I’m still not throwing in the midget for free.
-
While I appreciate the tribe welcoming me into their fold, I
While I appreciate the tribe welcoming me into their fold, I knew I was in for a long night when they put me up in a wigwam with Splayed with Aching Clitoris.
-
I greeted my husband at the door wearing nothing but Saran Wrap.
I greeted my husband at the door wearing nothing but Saran Wrap. But the other bitchy
-
It’s tough being on the road so much, away from my wife and
It’s tough being on the road so much, away from my wife and family. However, it helps me to listen to Journey’s “Faithfully” while I’m driving one home in the Motel 6 cleaning lady.
-
I like my coffee like I like my women: half-digested and culled
I like my coffee like I like my women: half-digested and culled from the feces of the Asian Palm Civet.
-
Thank God for Ruminations. I’ve tried for years to get Heloise
Thank God for Ruminations. I’ve tried for years to get Heloise to publish the following hint: “Tired of sleeping on the wet spot? Keep a hair dryer plugged in next to the bed. One minute on high is all it takes to dry that spot up so you can sleep easy.”
