I think the strongest argument in favor of intelligent design is that every time you poop, it comes out looking like poop, never something random like a flower or a hedgehog.
Delivery Style: One-liner
One-liner joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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You know you’re getting old when, each time you order wine at a restaurant, you find
You know you’re getting old when, each time you order wine at a restaurant, you find yourself sounding more and more like Thurston Howell III.
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As a Type B personality, sometimes I wonder why *we* can’t be named Type A.
As a Type B personality, sometimes I wonder why *we* can’t be named Type A. Then again, I guess it isn’t worth getting stressed about.
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“Wheel of Fortune” Ancient Egypt Week: “Is there anything that looks like two birds
“Wheel of Fortune” Ancient Egypt Week: “Is there anything that looks like two birds trying to kill a snake, Pat?”
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The difference between a cat and a dog: One acts like he can’t possibly live without
The difference between a cat and a dog: One acts like he can’t possibly live without you; the other acts like he would be willing to give it a shot.
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Something must be fu#$ed up with my Life Alert notifications.
Something must be fu#$ed up with my Life Alert notifications. I keep getting messages from Keith Richards saying he’s out of Jack Daniel’s.
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I’m not much for Disney on Ice, but if they ever make a Disney on Fire, I’m so there.
I’m not much for Disney on Ice, but if they ever make a Disney on Fire, I’m so there.
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Puppy playdate?
Puppy playdate? At our place? Great idea! Why, just the other day, I was remarking to the wife that we dont have nearly enough dogs pooping in our backyard.
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I’m not a coffee guy, so I’m never sure what to order at Starbucks.
I’m not a coffee guy, so I’m never sure what to order at Starbucks. Today I got the Vanilla Blonde Roast, because I really like all three of those separately.
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I’m never quite certain just how to celebrate Ambiguity Awareness Day.
I’m never quite certain just how to celebrate Ambiguity Awareness Day.
