I was reminiscing with an old school friend the other day.
I said, “Do you remember when the sun would rise in the morning and set in the evening?”
He said, “Ahhh, those were the days…”
Delivery Style: setup-punchline
Setup-punchline joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Pile of Wet Jeans by the Riverbank
I heard there was a pile of wet jeans left by the riverbank.
So I drove my Chevy to the Levi’s, but the Levi’s were dry.
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Husbands, if your wife does something wrong
Husbands, if your wife does something wrong, just explain to her how your mom did it.
She will appreciate your advice and strive to do it as she did.
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Did you hear that Apple revealed a new device today that tells a dad joke at the push of a button?
Did you hear that Apple revealed a new device today that tells a dad joke at the push of a button?
They’re calling it the iRoll.
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When it comes to being a good father for my daughters, I have three unwritten rules
When it comes to being a good father for my daughters, I have three unwritten rules:
1)
2)
3)
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I made a model of Mount Everest
I made a model of Mount Everest.
Not to scale, just to look at.
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My bank recently called me to let me know I had an outstanding balance
My bank recently called me to let me know I had an outstanding balance.
I said, “Thanks, I used to do gymnastics,” and hung up the phone.
That was nice of them.
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Count Chocula, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man, and the Teddy Grahams bear all perish in a fire
Breaking News!
Count Chocula, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man, and the Teddy Grahams bear all perish in a fire.
S’more at 11.
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My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch
My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch.
I call it lunch.
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A man goes to the doctor and complains that he has a bright orange penis
A man goes to the doctor and complains that he has a bright orange penis. The doctor takes a look, and sure enough, the man’s penis is bright orange.
The doctor asks the man about his daily habits to see if he could get a clue about the cause of the malady.
The man says, “My day is pretty normal. I get up in the morning and go to work. My work is at a desk in an office, so I don’t come into contact with any strange chemicals. I come home after work, make myself dinner, watch a little TV, then get ready for bed.”
The doctor asks, “Do you do anything before bed?”
The man says, “Nothing unusual, I just surf the web and eat Cheetos.”
