Thanks to my dog’s coprophagia, today I encountered the most foul, vile substance ever known: dog-poop vomit. As disgusting as it was to clean up, there’s a bright side: I’m a shoe-in to get filthy Rumination of the day!
Delivery Style: wordplay
Wordplay joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Whenever I help my boyfriend get off by letting him watch me
Whenever I help my boyfriend get off by letting him watch me masturbate, after he thanks me I like to say, “Happy to lend a helping finger!”
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I thought I had a great name for my new line of vaginal pasties,
I thought I had a great name for my new line of vaginal pasties, but apparently “lipstick” is already taken.
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hilarious submissions, so here we go… * * * *** * * * * * *
hilarious submissions, so here we go… * * * *** * * * * * * Did you catch that? I just farted in Braille!
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Unless one is young, healthy and very spry, just how exactly
Unless one is young, healthy and very spry, just how exactly COULD one give a flying fuck?
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True love knows no bounds. But it *does* know how to tie you to
True love knows no bounds. But it *does* know how to tie you to the bed and fuck your lights out.
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My sister couldn’t believe herself when she accepted an offer of
My sister couldn’t believe herself when she accepted an offer of sex from the man with the world’s smallest penis. She didn’t know she had it in her.
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Mr. and Mrs. Wood-Johnson sure dodged a bullet when they named
Mr. and Mrs. Wood-Johnson sure dodged a bullet when they named their son Robert instead of Richard.
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Have you ever tried to donkey-punch yourself when jerking off?
Have you ever tried to donkey-punch yourself when jerking off? The toughest part is figuring out which sock puppet gets to do the deed.
