Can you grab a card on the way home? My coworker’s mom died
Loss of Loved One
ADIOS!
Loss of Loved One
what the fuck is wrong with you?
Format: screenshot
Screenshot comedy formats, jokes, memes, and punchlines organized for easier doom-scrolling from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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White Man Robbing Store
Creat a picture of a white man robbing a store
(AI generated a man wearing all white clothing)
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Dear God Most Likely Yes
OFFICER: the victims were dismembered and sacrificed on an altar made of antlers
DETECTIVE: dear god
OFFICER: most likely yes
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Roland the Farter
Imagine farting so good that the King gives you a 30 acre estate.
Imagine someone farting so good, that you’re reading about them right now, 900 years later.
Roland the Farter – a medieval flatulist who lived in twelfth-century England. Given Hemingstone manor in Suffolk and 12 hectares (30 acres) of land in return for his services as a jester for King Henry II. Each year he was obliged to perform “Unum saltum et siffletum et unum bumbulum” (one jump, one whistle, and one fart) for the King’s court at Christmas.
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The Ice Cube Rating System
“I didn’t have to use my AK, today was a good day.” Honestly, a perfectly scalable life satisfaction metric.
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Jeopardy: Blood, Sweat, and Tears
Category: BLOOD, SWEAT, AND TEARS. Contestant shrugs, commits to the bit, walks away $8,800 richer and forever remembered.
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The Greatest Headline of Our Generation
A Tumblr hall-of-famer: suicidal trip to Mexico pivots hard into a week-long coke and hookers bender, and the patient decides life might be worth sticking around for after all. Poetry.
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Chunky Peanut Butter
David Veltri @Veltrida
i don’t wanna be rude, but i’ve gathered enough info in my life to know that people who like chunky peanut butter like to be choked during sex
