I can understand sign language. If you accidentally brush your tit on my arm it means “Buy me a drink.”
Joke Type: bait and switch
Bait and switch jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.
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Girls say they want a funny guy, but leave off “who’s not fat”
Girls say they want a funny guy, but leave off “who’s not fat” — like I say I want a nice girl but leave off “who’s hot, rich and into butt stuff.”
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I thought about getting a snippet of a language I don’t speak
I thought about getting a snippet of a language I don’t speak tattooed on me. How’s this “camel cock” from ancient Egyptian hieroglyphics?
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Tonight’s forecast: Overnight highs in the mid 70s with mostly
Tonight’s forecast: Overnight highs in the mid 70s with mostly cloudy skies and a 60% chance of me cornholing your sister.
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You can have my penis when you pry it from my cold, dead hands.
You can have my penis when you pry it from my cold, dead hands. Gun. I meant gun.
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“STOP BLOWING IT FOR EVERYONE!!” I yelled at the fluffer on the
“STOP BLOWING IT FOR EVERYONE!!” I yelled at the fluffer on the set of our “Addams Family” themed porno.
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“Fuck!” -Misaki, age 8 “Fuck!” -Yuuto, 7 “FUCK!” -Takaya, 8
“Fuck!” -Misaki, age 8 “Fuck!” -Yuuto, 7 “FUCK!” -Takaya, 8 Teaching the English word FORK to Japanese kids is hard.
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Wow. I thought she said she was “a bukkake fan.” Turns out she
Wow. I thought she said she was “a bukkake fan.” Turns out she said she was “a big hockey fan.” I guess I’m not getting into her “penalty box” either.
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I was walking my dog when a lady asked if the shit pile on her
I was walking my dog when a lady asked if the shit pile on her lawn was mine and I got super offended because I haven’t shat on a lawn in weeks.
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Forgot to take my kid to school this morning, in case you’re
Forgot to take my kid to school this morning, in case you’re wondering how nice that woman’s tits were last night.
