I guess I can be pretty naive. When my e-Harmony date texted me that he “couldn’t wait to spend time looking at the top of my head”, I thought he was just really tall.
Joke Type: observational
Observational jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.
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I’ll bet when Alice and Sam the Butcher did it, they’d both hang
I’ll bet when Alice and Sam the Butcher did it, they’d both hang lots of meat euphemisms, like “slipping her the sausage.”
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Fasterbate; verb – to attempt to quickly finish rubbing one out
Fasterbate; verb – to attempt to quickly finish rubbing one out in a place where discovery of the activity would be extremely awkward, such as at the urinal, in one’s cubicle or waiting at the drive-thru at In-and-Out Burger.
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I don’t know why men are always so interested in tits. On the
I don’t know why men are always so interested in tits. On the other hand, I don’t know why *I’m* so interested in them either. Ah, the mysteries of life.
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After 10 years of marriage, my wife and I have a comfortable
After 10 years of marriage, my wife and I have a comfortable routine: I get sex after she goes on a shopping bender, then waits till I cum before informing me how much she spent.
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The elevator at work is possessed by horny demons! Every time I
The elevator at work is possessed by horny demons! Every time I get in, there’s a mystical voice that says, “Going down.”
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I can always tell when I’m getting better after being sick when
I can always tell when I’m getting better after being sick when I again feel well enough to jerk off to Shake-Weight commericals on YouTube.
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Maybe it’s just me, but I’d bet if you whispered, “Be gentle,”
Maybe it’s just me, but I’d bet if you whispered, “Be gentle,” to your cellmate, it’s pretty likely just the OPPOSITE is going to happen.
