That heat is brutal at night ffs, state of my bed this morning
Joke Type: relatable
Relatable jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.
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When You Have to Hold Her Like This at Night Because She Steals
When you have to hold her like this at night because she steals
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HR Says I’m No Longer Allowed to Answer the Phone With For Fuck Sake What Now
MF FairyPrincessSmoo @Smooheed
HR says I’m no longer allowed to answer the phone with “for fuck sake, what now”
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Gotta Get Wisdom Teeth Out – Why? Gotta Make Room for More Dicks?
siouxchiefsouschef @legitwidget
overheard one kid at the Mall of America tell his friends he had to get his wisdom teeth out and his friend says “why? gotta make room for more dicks?” and wow insults have really come a long way since I was a kid
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When You Said You Were a Monster in Bed But Didn’t Get Specific
When you said you were a monster in bed, but didn’t get specific
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Time for a Reality Check – Would Not Recommend
paul bassett davies @thewritertype
Ok, it’s time for a reality check.
*checks reality*
Holy shit. Would not recommend.
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My First High School Football Game Was a Lot Like the First Time I Had Sex
MY FIRST HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL GAME WAS A LOT LIKE THE FIRST TIME I HAD SEX
I WAS BLOODY AND SORE BUT AT LEAST MY DAD CAME
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Golden O’ral – Don’t Fall for This Trap, Only Got a Shitty Buffet
Don’t fall for this trap! I expected a good time but only got a shitty buffet instead
golden o’ral
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Me: Trying the Ol’ Yawn/Reach Around the Shoulder Trick – Other Guy at Urinal: Hey
andrew @AndrewChamings
me: *trying the ol’ yawn/reach-around-the-shoulder trick*
other guy at urinal: hey
