Joke Type: shock value

Shock value jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.

  • Grandma Used to Say Don’t Brag About How Good You Can Cook

    Grandma Used to Say Don’t Brag About How Good You Can Cook

    Grandma used to say, “Don’t brag about how good you can cook, men will eat 3 day old pizza. Impress him with anal sex.”

  • Epstein’s Christmas Dinner

    What does Jeffrey Epstein serve for a Christmas dinner?

    Holy infant, so tender and mild.

  • Teeth Marks

    How do you know that a suicide victim was gay?

    The teeth marks are farther down the barrel.

  • Trans Fat

    What do you get when you cremate a femboy/tomboy?

    Trans fat.

  • Came out of the closet

    While the police are wrongly referring to it as an aborted attempt to rob a convenience store, I couldn’t be prouder that I finally came out of the closet with my pantyhose fetish.

  • Subway Revelation: A Lengthy Mistake!

    Two things happened today.

    First, I learned that my penis is not as long as a 6-inch sub from Subway.

    Second, I was banned from my local Subway shortly after this revelation.

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  • Okay, who farted?

    Three guys from San Francisco are in a hot tub when suddenly a large blob of semen rises to the top.
    One of the guys stands up, angry, and asks, “Okay, WHO farted?”

  • Here comes the second one

    How do terrorists feed their children?
    “Here comes the airplane.”
    “Here comes the second one.”

  • The taste

    What’s the difference between a rectal thermometer and a regular thermometer?
    The taste.

  • Grief Lessons: Good Counsel, No Tears

    My grief councillor died last week.

    Luckily for me, though, he was very good at his job, because I really don’t give a shit.