I suffer from pre-traumatic stress disorder. I don’t know what’s going to happen, or even when something traumatic will happen, but you can bet your ass I’ll be screaming and crying hours before it goes down.
Sensitivity: PG-13
Pg-13 humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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They say that unless you’re the lead dog, the view never changes.
They say that unless you’re the lead dog, the view never changes. But it’s not really that bad if the bitch in front of you has a great ass.
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They say since the big earthquake, the earth’s day is now 1 millionth of a second shorter.
They say since the big earthquake, the earth’s day is now 1 millionth of a second shorter. Damn, I *just* set the clocks for Daylight Saving Time; now I have to set them again!?!
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It’s a shame they don’t let you take dogs to the zoo, because that would be the greatest
It’s a shame they don’t let you take dogs to the zoo, because that would be the greatest day EVER for them. They could smell hundreds of different new kinds of poop, and bark at animals from all seven continents. Why do they block dogs from experiencing such insane joy??
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If your heart tells you one thing and your head another, give the deciding vote to your
If your heart tells you one thing and your head another, give the deciding vote to your ass.
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If the news media were to suddenly announce that a nuclear bomb is flying on its way to
If the news media were to suddenly announce that a nuclear bomb is flying on its way to the USA, I’m sure millions of people would shit themselves. That’s probably why they call them Incontinental Ballistic Missiles.
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Using the men’s room stall immediately after another guy left me torn between being the
Using the men’s room stall immediately after another guy left me torn between being the pleasure of having a warm seat versus being the disgust at using another dude’s ass-heat.
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I think the strongest argument in favor of intelligent design is that every time you
I think the strongest argument in favor of intelligent design is that every time you poop, it comes out looking like poop, never something random like a flower or a hedgehog.
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I brought a toilet plunger as my weapon of choice to this gang fight, because shit be
I brought a toilet plunger as my weapon of choice to this gang fight, because shit be going DOWN. /@B0nrMunky
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Women complain about the pain while giving birth.
Women complain about the pain while giving birth. Hey ladies, right about the time you stop having babies, I have to start paying some guy to stick a gloved finger up my ass every years for the rest of my life.
