THE FIRST RULE OF DEAF CLUB…
NYOU NU NOT NALK AMOUT NEF GLUB,
Sensitivity: PG-13
Pg-13 humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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I Think He Wants to Buy Mom
Lil’ Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horses’ legs, rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, “Pop, why are you doing that?”
“Because I’m thinking of buying these horses.”
Johnny looked worried, “Then I think we’d better hurry home right away!”
“Why?” his father asked.
“Because the milkman stopped by yesterday, and I think he wants to buy Mom!”
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Disney Or Jerry Springer
When someone asks about your family and you’re trying to decide if you should tell them the Disney or Jerry Springer version.
Crystallowerycomedy on fb
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Ive Never Seen a Smaller Dick in My Life
A man goes to a urologist.
Urologist: “Sir, please take off your pants and underpants”.
The man does so.
Urologist: “I’m warning you, this is going to hurt”.
The man says that he’s ready.
Urologist, laughing: “I’ve never seen a smaller dick in my life!”
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Stevie Wonder Child Support
You think your life is bad, Stevie Wonder paying 25K a month in child support, for some kids he ain’t NEVER SEEN..
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Deaf Gang Signs
Him: I try to talk and she just mumbles and throws up gang signs
Her: *signals* I’m deaf
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Pirate Hook
A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said: “Hey, I haven’t seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible.”
“What do you mean?” said the pirate, “I feel fine.”
Bartender: “What about the wooden leg? You didn’t have that before.”
Pirate: “Well, we were in a battle and I got hit with a cannon ball, but I’m fine now.”
Bartender: “Well, ok, but what about that hook? What happened to your hand?”
Pirate: “We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook. I’m fine, really…”
Bartender: “What about that eye patch?”
Pirate: “Oh, one day we were at sea and a flock of birds flew over. I looked up and one of them shit in my eye.”
Bartender: “You’re kidding, you lost an eye just from bird shit?”
Pirate: “It was my first day with the hook.”
