I got kicked out of my charades club for “gratuitous” nudity. But without disrobing and flopping, how would anybody have guessed “Elephant Man”?
Sensitivity: Questionable
Questionable humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
-
Paying for a Lap Dance
I wouldn’t have paid that much for a lap dance if I’d known she was going to do the Chicken Dance.
-
I’d Rather Watch a Video of My Conception
I think I’d rather watch a video of my conception than watch another debate.
-
Those Viagra Commercials Don’t Warn You
Those Viagra commercials don’t warn you about the embarrassing effects the drug has on vestigial tails.
-
People Magazine and the Sexiest Man
Hey, People Magazine! Unless you’re worried about angry letters from necrophiliacs, you can just say “Sexiest Man.”
-
I Asked My Scottish Friend How Many Sexual Partners He’s Had
I asked my Scottish friend how many sexual partners he’s had.
He started counting but soon fell asleep.
-
The Pussy Willow
A boy holding duct tape walks by an old man on a bench. He says he is going to catch ducks, and later returns with ducks wrapped in duct tape.
The next day, he returns with chickens wrapped in chicken wire.
The day after, he has a plant in a pot. He says, “It’s a pussy willow.”
The old man says, “Wait right there. Imma get my hat. I’m coming with you.”
-
The Cat On The Roof
A wife goes on vacation and asks her husband how her cat is doing.
The husband says, “The cat’s dead.”
She tells him he should have broken the news gently by saying the cat was on the roof and they couldn’t get her down.
Then she asks how her mother is doing.
The husband says, “Your mother’s on the roof and we can’t get her down.”
-
A Box Of Condoms
Two older women were outside their nursing home, having a smoke when it started to rain. One pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking.
She explained that it kept her cigarette dry.
The next day, the other lady went to the drugstore and asked for a box of condoms. The pharmacist asked what brand she preferred.
“Doesn’t matter, son, as long as it fits a Camel.”
