Sensitivity: Uncensored

Uncensored humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

I don’t know what I’m going to miss the most about my girlfriend

I don’t know what I’m going to miss the most about my girlfriend now that we’re ending our relationship, but I’ve narrowed it down to one of three things: her tits, her tits, or her tits.
I went up to a gorgeous woman in a bar and said, “You know, you

I went up to a gorgeous woman in a bar and said, “You know, you can’t spell ‘cunnilingus’ without ‘us.’” She made a fist and said, “And you can’t spell ‘blowjob’ without ‘ow’!”
Confucius say: Pierced man who has sex with blow-up doll get

Confucius say: Pierced man who has sex with blow-up doll get more bang for buck.
Reflecting on my latest Bible study reading, I told the group I

Reflecting on my latest Bible study reading, I told the group I felt bad for Lot. Can you imagine the pain one suffers when fucking a pillar of salt?
I can always tell when I’m getting better after being sick when

I can always tell when I’m getting better after being sick when I again feel well enough to jerk off to Shake-Weight commericals on YouTube.
It’s all fun and games till my boyfriend cums on my tits and

It’s all fun and games till my boyfriend cums on my tits and another girl licks it off. Then it’s… Whoa, weird — it’s still fun and games. Win!
If I had a nickel for every lava-lamp menorah I sold this

If I had a nickel for every lava-lamp menorah I sold this season, I wonder if that would be anywhere close to enough to pay to see Jilly G.’s tits?
If I had a nickel for every Rumination that mentioned my tits,

If I had a nickel for every Rumination that mentioned my tits, I’d stick them on my tits. I’ll bet they’d make *awesome* pasties.
I like threesomes with two girls and one guy better than those

I like threesomes with two girls and one guy better than those with two guys and one girl. It makes sense, given human nature: See, girls like variety while guys only like pussy.
Good: Saying “hello” and getting a smile in return from the

Good: Saying “hello” and getting a smile in return from the lovely maid who arrives as you leave your extended-stay hotel room for a quick bite to eat. Bad: Realizing 10 minutes later that you left your wank rag and hotel lotion on the night stand. Again.