I was sitting down having a beer watching my wife mow the lawn, and this old lady came over and shouted at me, “You should be hung!”
I shouted back, “I am… that’s why she mows the lawn!”
Cheeky humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
I was sitting down having a beer watching my wife mow the lawn, and this old lady came over and shouted at me, “You should be hung!”
I shouted back, “I am… that’s why she mows the lawn!”
In bed with a priest, a nun said, “Father, I never expected you’d have such a small organ.”
He replied, “Why, Sister… I never expected to be playing in such a large cathedral.”
I recently joined a nudist colony.
The first few days were the hardest.
A prostitute approaches a guy. “Hey babe, do you want to have sex for $400?”
Guy: “Funny that you ask, I could use that money very well.”
I just found out my girlfriend isn’t a virgin.
Her kids and I are shocked.
My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic…
But if I’m gonna have sex, it’s going to be on my own Accord.
My doctor said I could masturbate as much as I want…
That’s what he meant when he said I could have a stroke at any time, right?
Happy Pride Month to Home Depot!
There isn’t a single piece of straight wood in that place.
The instructor in my self-defense class said that the most effective place to kick a man is near his knees.
Personally, I think it’s nuts.

look what I found in my mother’s room
Aye man, I wouldn’t watch that if I were you