Money is tight everywhere, but there are some things are worth paying more for. For example, I got this DVD titled “Mothers I Guess I Probably Would Be Willing to Fuck If I Couldn’t Do Any Better And Was Really Drunk And Knew None of My Friends Would Ever Find Out About It.” Surprisingly, it was just awful. That’s the last time I buy porn at the dollar store.
Tone: Sarcastic
Sarcastic jokes, dry insults, eye-roll energy, and punchlines that need a workplace warning from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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You know you’re an over-sexed guy when you have to quit your job
You know you’re an over-sexed guy when you have to quit your job at Krispy Kreme ’cause you just can’t look at one more fucking hole.
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If they can’t invent a pill that makes a penis longer, can they
If they can’t invent a pill that makes a penis longer, can they maybe invent one that makes a vagina shallower?
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I’m not the kind of girl who whores herself out for booty calls;
I’m not the kind of girl who whores herself out for booty calls; with MY rack, it’s all about Titty Calls.
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I love those days when you spend the whole day in your PJs. And
I love those days when you spend the whole day in your PJs. And my co-workers *really* love the crotchless silk teddy I’m wearing.
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I am fuck’s biggest fan. I stalk fuck. Why can’t life be more
I am fuck’s biggest fan. I stalk fuck. Why can’t life be more like fucking all the time?
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My rules for a night of married sex are now the same rules for a
My rules for a night of married sex are now the same rules for a family evening at home: Don’t block the TV and don’t wake me if I fall asleep.
