Topic: politics
Political jokes, public meltdowns, campaign nonsense, and democracy having a day from Chaotic Meh — sharp, strange, and probably not safe to explain at brunch.
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Donald Trump – Happy Women’s Day, Send Nudes
Donald J. Trump @realDonaldTrump
Happy women’s day. Send nudes.
3/8/17, 10:50 AM
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Stimulus Checks Are Being Spent on Dildos, Tigers, Guns and Stripper Poles
NEW YORK POST
Stimulus checks are being spent on dildos, tigers, guns and stripper poles
By Hannah Frishberg
Damnit, I love this country so much.
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Be Honest
Be honest. You know that if a brown-skinned, Palestinian Jew attended a Trump rally and told the attendees to feed the hungry, house the homeless and welcome the stranger, they’d call Him a Socialist Libtard then crucify Him again.
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No, It Has to Be the Bull
A politician was touring his rural constituency in his shiny Range Rover, press in tow, visiting farmers, showing his face, and trying to come across as a man of the people.
He suddenly found the narrow country lane blocked by a bull being led by a small girl with a rope through its nose ring.
As the girl tugged at the aggravated bull’s rope, the politician got out to see how he could be of assistance.
With the press looking on, he approached the girl and asked, “Young lady, just what are you doing with such a large, dangerous animal on the public road?”
“This old bull?” says the girl. “I’m taking him down to the neighbors’ place to service one of their cows.”
“Shouldn’t your father be doing that?” asks the politician.
“Oh no…” says the girl. “It has to be the bull.”
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You Can Start Right Away
A campaigning politician was driving through the countryside, meeting his constituents.
As he passed a farmhouse, he struck and killed a rooster in the road.
He told the farmer, “Sorry, but I’ve run over your rooster.”
Reaching for his wallet, he added, “I’d very much like to replace him, of course.”
The farmer said, “Fine. You can start right away — the chickens are out back.”
