Topic: work

Work jokes, office memes, job interview disasters, coworker chaos, and professional suffering with just enough sarcasm to survive another meeting.

  • Service Dog Drug Dog

    Service Dog Drug Dog

    Switching jobs from service dog to drug sniffing dog is the best decision I ever made. Oh yeah, woof, or something.

  • Black Highlighters CIA

    Black Highlighters CIA

    CIA Realizes It’s Been Using Black Highlighters All These Years

  • Jokes About Unemployed People

    I have a lot of jokes about unemployed people.

    But it doesn’t matter, none of them work.

  • I Need a Handsaw

    Construction worker on the 5th floor of a building needed a handsaw.

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    So he spots another worker on the ground floor and yells down to him, but he can’t hear him. So the worker on the 5th floor tries sign language.

    He pointed to his eye meaning “I”, pointed to his knee meaning “need”, then moved his hand back and forth in a hand saw motion.

    The man on the ground floor nods his head, pulls down his pants, whips out his cock, starts masturbating and points at it.

    The worker on 5th floor gets so pissed off he runs down to the ground floor and says, “What the fuck is your problem!!! I said I needed a hand saw!”

    The other guy says, “I knew that! I was just trying to tell you – I’m coming!”

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  • IRS Agent Gets Robbed of His Own Money

    A man is walking on the sidewalk at night when suddenly he’s attacked by a mugger.

    Mugger: “Give me all of your money!”

    Man: “Do you know who I am?! I work for the IRS!”

    Mugger: “Oh? Well in that case, give me all of MY money!”

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  • Love Blooms in Workplace Jealousy

    “Darling,” murmured the girl to her boyfriend, “when did you first realize that you were in love with me?”

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    “Well, I suppose…” whispered the man tenderly, “it was when I started getting angry with all the other guys in the office who said you were a lousy lay.”

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  • Worst Timing Ever Beats Wife’s Infidelity

    Guy leaves the bar, hoping he can get home early enough not to piss his wife off for drinking after work. He gets home and finds his boss in bed with his wife.

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    Later, back at the bar, the guy tells the bartender the story, “Wow, that’s awful, what did you do?”

    “Well, I carefully snuck back out the door, and hightailed it back here. Shoot, they were just getting started, so I figure I got time for a couple more beers.”

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  • Computer Safety: A Gentleman’s Guide

    1. It is unsafe to lick your monitor while it is ON.

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    2. The orifices in the back of your monitor are NOT intended for participation in the LIVE sex shows.

    3. The fan in your computer’s power supply is not a good place to cool your “heat of passion” (although, it would certainly be an enlightening experience).

    4. Be prepared to replace your keyboard often if you enjoy “tickling the keys” with your manhood.

    5. Semen IS electrically conductive!

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  • Cat LinkedIn Reality

    Cat LinkedIn Reality

    Reality: I poop in the litter box myself.

    LinkedIn: Independently executes a self-sanitation protocol, expertly managing bio-waste in designated litter facilities. Maintains exceptional personal hygiene and cleanliness, contributing to a well-ordered and harmonious home environment.

  • IT Guys Such Dicks

    IT Guys Such Dicks

    Why are IT guys such dicks?

    Last week I drove two hours to push the power button on a server that three separate people assured me was already on.