I kind of understand my long-distance girlfriend’s sudden decision to want to sleep with local guys when I’m not around. Her desire to sleep with them when I *am* around is more troubling.
Delivery Style: bait and switch
Bait and switch joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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All of a sudden, my girlfriend is willing to try all sorts of
All of a sudden, my girlfriend is willing to try all sorts of stuff in bed that she’s never been interested in before. Woohoo! I’ve been waiting forever for– hey, what the hell?!?
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I should never have told that chick on Craigslist that I was
I should never have told that chick on Craigslist that I was into humiliation. Right after she had HER orgasm, she took me to a bus stop and gave me $2 for fare.
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I’m really pissed off. I picked up a guy from Craigslist, got
I’m really pissed off. I picked up a guy from Craigslist, got off, and dropped him at the bus stop after giving him $2 — and he never gave me back my change!
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A good kiss can bring me to my knees. Not literally — *that*
A good kiss can bring me to my knees. Not literally — *that* takes jewelry.
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Maybe I’m being too picky. A guy doesn’t have to have a 50-foot
Maybe I’m being too picky. A guy doesn’t have to have a 50-foot yacht or a big dick for me to be interested. I would also notice him if he has a really hot girlfriend.
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You’d think my girlfriend would be more open to anal sex,
You’d think my girlfriend would be more open to anal sex, considering she’s thoroughly enjoyed my kissing her ass all these years.
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After I called a woman for a blind date last week, I couldn’t
After I called a woman for a blind date last week, I couldn’t remember whether she told me that she was a “virgin” or a “vegan.” So on our first date I hedged my bets by banging her *and* bringing her a salad.
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Memo to my blind date: It doesn’t matter if I’m a virgin or a
Memo to my blind date: It doesn’t matter if I’m a virgin or a vegan, I just wanted you to eat ME, dork.
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When my boyfriend sent me to get a Brazilian, I first thought I
When my boyfriend sent me to get a Brazilian, I first thought I was going to fuck a hot chick from Rio. Either way, now I can’t fucking walk.
