I’m sick of lying in bed and playing with myself all day long. I suppose I need to find someone to do that for me.
Delivery Style: bait and switch
Bait and switch joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Don’t you hate it when you get that not-so-fresh feeling and
Don’t you hate it when you get that not-so-fresh feeling and you’re miles away from the ladies’ room and your panties are bunching up and on top of everything else, your balls itch, too?
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My wife and I just love experimenting in the kitchen! Last week
My wife and I just love experimenting in the kitchen! Last week we tried deviled eggs flavored with orange zest and Thai sriracha sauce. The week before that I banged her on the top dishwasher rack while she shoved a wire whisk up my ass.
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My boyfriend ran out on me. Luckily I’d used rechargeable batteries
My boyfriend ran out on me. Luckily I’d used rechargeable batteries.
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You know when you send a stupid email, then have to immediately
You know when you send a stupid email, then have to immediately send another saying, “Oops, I hit send too soon!”? Well, I like to instead write, “Oops, I was playing with my clit and clicked the wrong button!” That way, they totally forget about the stupid email.
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I think that woman at the animal shelter is overreacting. I
I think that woman at the animal shelter is overreacting. I never said I wanted to adopt a kitten; I said I wanted a little pussy.
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I guess it’s my fault; I kept telling my girlfriend I wanted to
I guess it’s my fault; I kept telling my girlfriend I wanted to see her get nasty and sweaty with another woman. But hair-pulling on “Jerry Springer” wasn’t exactly what I had in mind.
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My new girlfriend is very talented: After oral sex she blows
My new girlfriend is very talented: After oral sex she blows semen bubbles then twists them into balloon animals!
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Isn’t it funny that the grandmother in “Little Red Riding Hood”
Isn’t it funny that the grandmother in “Little Red Riding Hood” was upset about being eaten by the wolf? There are people who strategically place peanut butter on their genitalia to try to entice the same effect out of household pets. Just sayin’.
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Okay, he got me for not wearing a seat belt. But I KNOW he saw
Okay, he got me for not wearing a seat belt. But I KNOW he saw the stickshift condom, yet he still gave me a ticket for reckless driving, too.
