Delivery Style: deadpan

Deadpan joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Asking for My Feed Back

    I bought some birdseed from Amazon, and the very next day they emailed asking for my feed back. Not cool.

  • Too Much History Between Us

    I was at the museum, and I suddenly saw my ex on the other side of the exhibition hall. I didn’t go and say hello though.

    There was too much history between us.

  • I Can’t Wait to Rub It In

    I have been diagnosed with a rare condition and my doctor prescribed me some anti-gloating cream medication.

    I can’t wait to rub it in.

  • Which Vowel Is the Most Important

    The other day, a friend and I had this long pointless argument as to which vowel is the most important.

    I won.

  • I’ve Come a Long Way

    It’s been 3 years since I started training for the ejaculation distance championships.

    Since then I’ve come a long way.

  • Only Sustained Light Injuries

    I accidentally ran into a lamp post. Thankfully, I only sustained light injuries.

  • More Than Red and Blue Combined

    My least favourite colour is purple.

    I dislike it more than red and blue combined.

  • I Just Don’t See It

    My friend thinks that a woman in camouflage is really sexy.

    I just don’t see it.

  • Up to My Chin Should Do It

    A man goes to a dermatologist with a rare skin disease. The doctor says, “Try a milk bath.”

    So the guy goes to the grocery store and tells the dairy manager he needs enough milk to take a bath. The dairy guy asks, “You want that pasteurized?”

    “Nah,” the man replies. “Up to my chin should do it.”

  • Does It Take Time to Develop

    Are people born with a photographic memory?

    Or does it take time to develop?