I think I’d rather watch a video of my conception than watch another debate.
Delivery Style: setup-punchline
Setup-punchline joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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My Son Has to Wear a Tuxedo for the School Band’s Holiday Concert
My son said he’s required to wear a tuxedo for the school band’s holiday concert. Now I have to buy him black yoga pants and one of those tuxedo T-shirts.
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My Amazon Wish List
I added a cello to my Amazon wish list, rich members of my fan club. I also added a home electrolysis system. The cello is cheaper.
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’Twas the Night Before Christmas
’Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring due to the carbon monoxide being given off by the defective space heater.
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World Kindness Day and International Day for Tolerance
November 13th is World Kindness Day. November 16th is International Day for Tolerance. Trust me, you do NOT want to confuse them.
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Today’s Intelligence World Changes So Rapidly
Today’s intelligence world changes so rapidly; it’s all the CIA can do to pretend not to keep up.
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I’m Concerned About Syrian Refugees Being Sent to Alabama
I’m concerned about the Syrian refugees being sent to Alabama. Haven’t these poor people suffered enough?
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People Magazine and the Sexiest Man
Hey, People Magazine! Unless you’re worried about angry letters from necrophiliacs, you can just say “Sexiest Man.”
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At the Walmart Self Checkout
Whenever the self checkout at Walmart says "insert cash or pay another way." I always push my titties together.
Never works.
