The problem with being a scat freak with a cold is that nobody knows what to think when you tell them you feel like fucking shit.
Format: one-liner
One-liners, quick jokes, short-form comedy, and punchlines built for impatient degenerates from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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There’s a job opening at the tampon factory. If you’re
There’s a job opening at the tampon factory. If you’re interested, I think I can pull a few strings.
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My man wanted to fuck me missionary-style. WTF? He knows I’m not
My man wanted to fuck me missionary-style. WTF? He knows I’m not religious.
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My new girlfriend is very talented: After oral sex she blows
My new girlfriend is very talented: After oral sex she blows semen bubbles then twists them into balloon animals!
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Of all the movie lines I’ve quoted in an effort to pick up a
Of all the movie lines I’ve quoted in an effort to pick up a guy, City Slickers’ “I shit bigger than you” is probably my least successful.
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Something tells me it’s not a good thing when the hooker first
Something tells me it’s not a good thing when the hooker first tells you there’s “absolutely no way” she’ll do anal, then sees your penis and says, “Oh, with THAT? Sure. No problem.”
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Ruminations are a lot like farts: You always like your own the best
Ruminations are a lot like farts: You always like your own the best.
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Gorgeous as they are, I’m nevertheless terrified of looking at
Gorgeous as they are, I’m nevertheless terrified of looking at my girlfriend’s breasts. Maybe I have A-rack-nophobia.
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(Phil Schwa) I always look at the positives, not the negatives.
(Phil Schwa) I always look at the positives, not the negatives. Today I’m grateful for the 99.9% of the time my anus knows the difference between a gas and another state of matter.
