Life lesson: Never play Naked Quarters if you don’t know what’s in the glass your friends refer to as “The Money Shot.”
Format: one-liner
One-liners, quick jokes, short-form comedy, and punchlines built for impatient degenerates from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
-
Sometimes I feel like a nut, and sometimes I’m more of an ass girl
Sometimes I feel like a nut, and sometimes I’m more of an ass girl.
-
Call me a fetishist, but I like my porn stars to show a little spunk
Call me a fetishist, but I like my porn stars to show a little spunk.
-
I sure hope Rapunzel’s carpet didn’t match the drapes in length,
I sure hope Rapunzel’s carpet didn’t match the drapes in length, because she’d never find pants that fit.
-
I believe God puts people in our lives for a reason. For
I believe God puts people in our lives for a reason. For example, I believe He brought me the new receptionist so I can stare at her tits all day.
-
Boy, did my junk sting after I made it with that chick at the
Boy, did my junk sting after I made it with that chick at the swingers club. I guess there’s some truth to that old saying, “Love is a many-splintered thing.”
-
Don’t you hate it when you’re masturbating to Christine
Don’t you hate it when you’re masturbating to Christine O’Donnell and just about to cum and Rosie O’Donnell pops into your head?
-
A wet dream is a wish your testicles make
A wet dream is a wish your testicles make.
-
My boyfriend loves getting my titty pics on his cell phone. The
My boyfriend loves getting my titty pics on his cell phone. The dude in line in front of him at Starbucks doesn’t like it nearly as much, though.
-
When people call me a “fucking idiot,” I consider it a
When people call me a “fucking idiot,” I consider it a compliment. After all, it’s my life’s ambition to do nothing but fuck like an idiot all day long.
