Setup-punchline comedy formats, jokes, memes, and punchlines organized for easier doom-scrolling from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
Two confirmed bachelors sat talking. Their conversation drifted from politics to cooking. “I got a cookbook once,” said the first, “but I could never do anything with it.”
“Too much fancy cooking in it, eh?” asked the second.
“You said it. Every one of the recipes began the same way – ‘Take a clean dish and….’”
A man and his wife were gardening in the back yard when the husband looks up to see his wife bending over to pick some flowers. He looks at her rear and then looks at the Webber Bar-B-Q, noticing that they are the same size.
He says to his wife, “Your butt is as big as our Bar-B-Q!”
She ignores him and goes back to her gardening. The husband can’t stand it so he goes to the garage and gets a tape measure and measures the Bar-B-Q and his wife’s rear and they are exactly the same size.
That night in bed the husband starts to cuddle with his wife, but the wife says, “Just what do you think you’re doing?”
The husband says, “I thought I was gonna get a little tonight.”
His wife replies, “If you think that I’m going to fire up this Webber Bar-B-Q for one little weenie, you are crazy!”
One night a wife found her husband standing over their newborn baby’s crib. Silently she watched him. As he stood looking down at the sleeping infant, she saw on his face a mixture of emotions: disbelief, doubt, delight, amazement, enchantment, skepticism. Touched by this unusual display and the deep emotions it aroused, with eyes glistening she slipped her arms around her husband.
“A penny for your thoughts,” she whispered in his ear.
“It’s amazing!” he replied. “I just can’t see how anybody can make a crib like that for only $46.50!”
A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, “How many women can a man marry?”
“Sixteen,” the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he knew the answer so quickly.
“How do you know that?”
“Easy,” the little boy said. “All you have to do is add it up, like the Preacher said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer.”
A boy was taking care of his baby sister while his parents went to town shopping. He decided to go fishing and he had to take her along.
“I’ll never do that again!” he told his mother that evening. “I didn’t catch a thing!”
“Oh, next time I’m sure she’ll be quiet and not scare the fish away,” his mother said.
The boy said, “It wasn’t that. She ate all the bait.”
