When I saw the guy in the next car pick his nose and wipe it on the passenger seat headrest, I thought, “Man, he doesn’t care what the world thinks!” I kind of admire that. But I wouldn’t want to ride with him.
Format: short form
Short form comedy formats, jokes, memes, and punchlines organized for easier doom-scrolling from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Bob Pope
The pope should change his name to Bob. Then he would be Bob Pope, and he could have charity golf tournaments and go around the world on tours with a star-studded cast as his entourage. It would certainly liven up his shows a bit.
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Now I want to break three
I was going through my old stuff when I broke two Queen records.
Now I want to break three. -
Aren’t going to work out
I asked my date to meet me at the gym, but she never showed up…
Guess the two of us aren’t going to work out. -
A ceiling rafter
I found a guy kayaking in my attic when I got home from work today…
It turns out he was a ceiling rafter.
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Comparing apples to oranges
Steve Jobs would have made a better president than Donald Trump…
But that’s comparing apples to oranges.
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High-Stakes Humor: Plane Drop Laughs!
Trump and Elon Musk are on a plane.
Trump says to Elon Musk, “I could drop $1 to the ground, and it would make one person happy—tremendous happiness, happiest ever!”
Elon replies, “I could drop 100 one-dollar bills to the ground and make 100 people happy!”
The pilot walks out of the cockpit and says, “I could drop this plane to the ground and make 8.2 billion people happy!”
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He was a good buoy
Did you hear about the dog who was floating in the ocean?
He was a good buoy…
