Joke Type: bait and switch

Bait and switch jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.

  • Not What It Looks Like

    So a girl walks in and catches her boyfriend masturbating to an optical illusion. “What the hell are you doing?” she screams.

    And he says, “Honey, it’s not what it looks like.”

  • Human DNA + Goat DNA

    What do you get when you mix human DNA with goat DNA?

    You get kicked out of the petting zoo!

  • Nine Volt Battery

    What’s the difference between a nine-volt battery and a butthole?

    Everyone knows not to stick their tongue on a nine-volt battery.

  • Cockatoo

    Do you happen to own a parrot?

    ‘Cause you look like you could handle a cockatoo.

  • Same T-Shirt

    At the party last night, there was a girl wearing the same T-shirt as me.

    It was a tight fit, but we managed.

  • Magic Relationship

    Wife wanted me to put the magic back into our relationship.

    But I don’t think sawing her in half was what she was thinking.

  • The Wizard’s Choice

    When I was a kid, a wizard gave me a choice — to have a giant dick, or perfect memory.

    I forgot which one I picked.

  • One Leg

    What has one leg and licks balls?

    My amputee girlfriend.

  • Same Name

    I should be happy because I have a new girlfriend. The problem is she has the same name as my sister. So every time we have sex now…

    …all I think about is my new girlfriend.