Joke Type: bait and switch

Bait and switch jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.

  • The Wizard’s Choice

    When I was a kid, a wizard gave me a choice — to have a giant dick, or perfect memory.

    I forgot which one I picked.

  • One Leg

    What has one leg and licks balls?

    My amputee girlfriend.

  • Same Name

    I should be happy because I have a new girlfriend. The problem is she has the same name as my sister. So every time we have sex now…

    …all I think about is my new girlfriend.

  • My frog impression

    I’ll never forget what my granddad said to me before he croaked.
    He said, “Hey kid, wanna hear my frog impression?”

  • Just a shot in the dark

    I was trying to get romantic with the new nurse at my doctor’s office, so I asked her to dim the lights before she gave me the tetanus booster.
    I guess it was just a shot in the dark.

  • Al Roker

    Should NBC be concerned? They keep getting communications that affect the weather from some rogue terrorist group called “Al Roker.”

  • I bleed at the sight of someone passing out

    I’ve always been different from most people. For instance, I bleed at the sight of someone passing out.

  • Prostate Exam My Name Is Steve

    Prostate Exam My Name Is Steve

    DURING THIS PROSTATE EXAM, PLEASE TRY NOT TO GET AN ERECTION, DAVE

    MY NAME IS STEVE

    YEAH I KNOW…

    MY NAME IS DAVE

    SLIPSHOD SQUIGGLES

  • Nothing to stop Aunt Bea and me

    I shot the sheriff and the deputy.
    Now there’s nothing to stop Aunt Bea and me from being together!

  • Cold Calls

    Someone just called my phone and sneezed, coughed, and then hung up.

    I’m getting sick of these cold calls.