I just joined a new fast-audio book club. We listen to standard audio books, but save time by just fast-forwarding through them to the end. I finished “The Great Gatsby” in 20 minutes. It’s an extremely overrated novel about a lot of high-pitched chirping noises.
Sensitivity: Clean
Clean humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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“TEIAM” — problem solved!
“TEIAM” — problem solved!
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Be careful if you flip the bird to a proctologist: You might be inadvertently giving him
Be careful if you flip the bird to a proctologist: You might be inadvertently giving him the secret fraternal high sign.
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Apparently “resisting the urge to unleash vengeful wrath on my co-workers” is not
Apparently “resisting the urge to unleash vengeful wrath on my co-workers” is not something the employee review team deems a valid coming-year goal.
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They don’t really want us to know it, but I’m sure that companies that design bathroom
They don’t really want us to know it, but I’m sure that companies that design bathroom fixtures all have at least one guy whose job is to design fake poo for testing purposes.
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I can’t decide who’s the bigger geek, the person who used “FF0000” for the vanity plate
I can’t decide who’s the bigger geek, the person who used “FF0000” for the vanity plate on their red car, or me because I knew that FF0000 is the hexadecimal value for red.
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This year, my resolution is for my neighbor to lose 30 pounds.
This year, my resolution is for my neighbor to lose 30 pounds. That way, come next January, *he’s* the slob with no willpower.
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It’s been said that power is the greatest aphrodisiac.
It’s been said that power is the greatest aphrodisiac. It’s true, women love guys who have power. They also seem to enjoy running water and central heating.
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Women are hard to figure out.
Women are hard to figure out. They love lingerie and they love garage sales, but they don’t seem to like getting garage-sale lingerie as a gift.
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If I were that famed limerick guy from Nantucket, I’d have made a lucrative career for
If I were that famed limerick guy from Nantucket, I’d have made a lucrative career for myself in the adult entertainment industry. But I’d probably still do that other thing, too.
