Man, they are so strict at my new job. It’s constantly: “No personal calls,” “Don’t surf the Web,” “Put your pants back on.” I mean, who can work in an environment like that?
Sensitivity: Clean
Clean humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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One advantage of our entire class of 1978 failing math is that we can pretty much show
One advantage of our entire class of 1978 failing math is that we can pretty much show up at any class reunions we choose.
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During long-ago times when pirates raided the high seas, I’d imagine only the kinkiest
During long-ago times when pirates raided the high seas, I’d imagine only the kinkiest and most masochistic of prostitutes would be known as “hookers.”
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If we don’t carefully conserve our valuable cheap joke reserves, soon we’ll find they’ve
If we don’t carefully conserve our valuable cheap joke reserves, soon we’ll find they’ve gone the way of the dildo.
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I think time is crucial to anything.
I think time is crucial to anything. For example, if you lock an infinite number of monkeys in a room with those typewriters, but you limit the amount of time they have to write, the best you’ll get out of them is the pilot to “The Dukes of Hazzard.”
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Great!
Great! After weathering the screening process required to join the polygamist sect, the elders decide to stick me with *one* wife who happens to have multiple personality disorder.
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Some people think I’m paranoid, but you never know when a rearview mirror on your
Some people think I’m paranoid, but you never know when a rearview mirror on your stationary bike will come in handy.
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I’ll bet the best thing about having your hand cut off is when you’re arguing with
I’ll bet the best thing about having your hand cut off is when you’re arguing with somebody and you say, “Talk to the hook.”
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I saw a quote that said: “Don’t say you don’t have time.
I saw a quote that said: “Don’t say you don’t have time. You have as much time as Albert Einstein or Thomas Edison did.” Yeah, but they were smarter than I am.
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I think there is nothing sadder than a crying clown — unless the clown is crying
I think there is nothing sadder than a crying clown — unless the clown is crying because he got hit in the crotch with a football, which would be hilarious.
