Jesus walks into a bar.
The bartender says, “You ain’t getting hammered here.”
Sensitivity: Clean
Clean humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Check-In With Jesus: A Divine Request
Jesus walks into a motel.
He puts three nails on the counter and says, “Can you put me up for the night?”
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Stuck in Ink: An Invisible Emergency!
I accidentally swallowed a bottle of invisible ink.
Now I am in the ER waiting to be seen.
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Diarrhea Awareness Week: Knowledge is Power!
Diarrhea Awareness starts on Monday.
Runs through Friday.
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Gym Woes: Broken Machines and No Treats!
I went to the gym the other day and my favorite machine was broken.
I couldn’t get any chocolate or Coke or anything.
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Bears and Bees: An Unlikely Connection
What would bears be without bees?
Ears
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Mother-in-Law Showdown: Whose Is Nicer?
My wife accused me of liking my relatives more than hers. I told her that was absolutely not true.
I thought her mother-in-law was much nicer than mine.
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Limo Dreams: No Driver, No Ride!
I just rented a limo for $500, then learned that fee doesn’t even include a driver.
So I spent all that money and have nothing to chauffeur it!
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Rash Decisions: A Lesson from Allergies
I woke up to an allergic reaction spreading all over my body.
My instinct was to go straight to the doctor, but then I realized that one should never make rash decisions!
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Little Johnny and Cows
Little Johnny is out riding his bike with his dad through the fields when he sees a bull on top of a cow.
Johnny: “Dad, what’s that bull doing?”
Dad: “Well, the sun’s about to set, Johnny, so the bull is just pushing the cow back into the barn.”Johnny: “Wow! It’s a good thing Mama held on to the kitchen table yesterday—otherwise the postman would’ve pushed her all the way back to the post office!”
