Him: You seen my cat lately Ling?
Her: Nope, you seen your dad lately Jamal?
Dark humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

Him: You seen my cat lately Ling?
Her: Nope, you seen your dad lately Jamal?

Hi I’m Howard Cosell and I just looked into the future and you’re not going to believe the Shit I’m about to tell you!!

The other day I went to a paraplegic strip club.
The place was crawling with pussy.

AND NOW MY LITTLE BOY,
I GONNA INSERT MY SECOND FINGER

“What are you doing father?”
“It’s called masturbating, you’ll be doing this soon”
“Why father?”
“Because my wrist is killing me!”

If a Woman Needs It, Should She Be Spanked?
[Today’s question by Herman Merlin, 125 Broad St. New York 4, N. Y.]
MIGUEL MATOS, Brooklyn, counterman: “Why not? If they don’t know how to behave by the time they’re adults, they should be treated like children and spanked. That ought to make them grow up in a hurry. If it doesn’t at first, they’ll soon get the idea.”
FRANK DESIDERIO, Brooklyn, barber: “Yes, when they deserve it. As a barber, I’ve got a lot of faith in the hairbrush. I think there are certain cases when it is advisable. When it is, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t go right ahead and do it. I can’t knock the idea. In my business, a man sets a lot of store by the results he can get with a hairbrush properly applied.”
TEDDY GALLEI, Brooklyn, parking lot attendant: “You bet. It teaches them who’s boss. A lot of women tend to forget this is a man’s world and a lot of men who stepped down as boss of a family wish they hadn’t. Spanking might help get back some of the respect they lost.”
WILLIAM DAVIS, Brooklyn, toy factory owner: “Yes. Most of them have it coming to them anyway. If they don’t, it will remind them how well off they are. I subscribe to the theory that an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”

Kids today have it too easy, all they have to do is click to watch a midget fuck a goat. We had to buy a goat and capture a midget.

I NOTICED MY WAITRESS HAS A BLACK EYE
SO I ORDERED VERY SLOWLY BECAUSE SHE OBVIOUSLY DOESN’T LISTEN.

BLACK FRIDAY
by @MarkDice
USE PROMO CODE “GEORGE FLOYD” AND SAVE 100%