Tone: Playful

Playful humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

Just my luck, I picked up the *karma* sutra book instead of the

Just my luck, I picked up the *karma* sutra book instead of the *kama* sutra. I guess what cums around goes around.
It seems reasonable to think that a “crap shoot” and a “poop

It seems reasonable to think that a “crap shoot” and a “poop shoot” are pretty much the same thing, but it turns out that they aren’t. Also, sometimes when something happens in Vegas, word spreads to Atlantic City.
Whenever I cum during sex, I like to say “Thank you” to my

Whenever I cum during sex, I like to say “Thank you” to my boyfriend. He appreciates it and says it makes it feel like he was in the room.
My boyfriend told me, “I want to take a picture of my cock

My boyfriend told me, “I want to take a picture of my cock between the twins.” WTF? I’m not so sure I want my niece and nephew that close to a rooster!
If I had a penis, I’d probably spend hours perfecting that

If I had a penis, I’d probably spend hours perfecting that “thwap” noise I’d want it to make when I hit it against my girlfriend.
I love it when you say things at work that can sound dirty, like

I love it when you say things at work that can sound dirty, like “When do you get off?” or “Hey, wanna fuck me on the copier?”
I can’t believe that dude was offended when I asked him if he

I can’t believe that dude was offended when I asked him if he enjoyed doing doggy styles. I guess pet groomers are just thin-skinned.
All of my men know the Rule of Tits: I have the tits; therefore,

All of my men know the Rule of Tits: I have the tits; therefore, I rule.
I’m sick of lying in bed and playing with myself all day long. I

I’m sick of lying in bed and playing with myself all day long. I suppose I need to find someone to do that for me.
I tried forever to find it, but ultimately gave up and told the

I tried forever to find it, but ultimately gave up and told the clerk at Lowe’s “I need caulk.”