Relationship jokes, dating disasters, marriage chaos, red flags, and emotionally questionable laughs for people who have loved, lost, and texted anyway.
A married guy was out getting a little “strange stuff” when he suffered a massive heart attack and died. The undertaker called his wife as he was preparing the body, saying, “Your late husband died with a tremendous erection that we can’t get to go away… What would you like us to do?”
Nina and Liz are having a conversation during their lunch break.
Nina asks, “So, Liz, how’s your sex life these days?”
Liz replies, “Oh, you know. It’s the usual, Social Security kind.”
“Social Security?” Nina asked quizzically.
“Yeah, you get a little each month, but it’s not enough to live on.”
It’s called chloroform … you’ll love it. It’s like aromatherapy but without all the struggling.
Him: Why are broken condoms on the couch?
Her: Would you PLEASE start using our children’s real names?
Husband: I’m getting you diamonds for our anniversary
Wife: Nothing would please me more
Husband: *Gets her nothing instead*
