My rules for a night of married sex are now the same rules for a family evening at home: Don’t block the TV and don’t wake me if I fall asleep.
Topic: relationships
Relationship jokes, dating disasters, marriage chaos, red flags, and emotionally questionable laughs for people who have loved, lost, and texted anyway.
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No one was surprised when my flat-chested girlfriend discovered
No one was surprised when my flat-chested girlfriend discovered her family originates from the former Soviet republic of Nojugsistan.
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When I told my wife I was interested in a threesome, she said
When I told my wife I was interested in a threesome, she said she “didn’t know what to do with that information.” Okay, Honey, let me help: Tell your hairdresser we want to fuck her seven ways to Sunday.
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Sometimes a girl just needs to hear those three little words:
Sometimes a girl just needs to hear those three little words: “I’d hit that.”
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My boyfriend’s diabetes is so bad that when I dressed as Candy
My boyfriend’s diabetes is so bad that when I dressed as Candy the Stripper for Halloween, he refused to eat me.
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I like using the iPhone to send pictures of myself totally nude
I like using the iPhone to send pictures of myself totally nude to my boyfriend, but the lighting in these Apple stores sucks.
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Sure, a big penis might please the ladies a little more, but it
Sure, a big penis might please the ladies a little more, but it would mean a LOT more work for me when I’m by myself, and that happens WAY more often.
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she’s saying, “Look what I can do that you can’t
she’s saying, “Look what I can do that you can’t.”
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I’ve been getting a lot of “but sex” lately. Women I date say,
I’ve been getting a lot of “but sex” lately. Women I date say, “I like you and all, but sex…”
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Dogs are man’s best friend. You can tell this because all your
Dogs are man’s best friend. You can tell this because all your other friends will stop having anything to do with you if you have their balls cut off.
