When you shave your balls
NEW LOOK SAME COCONUTS
Topic: sex
Dark sex jokes, adult memes, awkward hookups, bedroom disasters, and the kind of punchlines that should probably clear their browser history afterward.
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Magnifying Glass Penis Enlarger
“Man buys product that promised to enlarge his penis and gets a magnifying glass”
Homem compra produto que prometia aumentar pênis e recebe lupa
PROCON Campina
PREFEITURA MUNICIPAL DE CAMPINA SECRETARIA MUNICIPAL DE ASSUNTOS JURÍDICOS Departamento de Proteção ao Consumidor
disque 151 www.procon.campina.sp.gov.br
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Mellencamp
When the dump is so big you accidentally give yourself a Mellencamp
mellencamp
To take a dump so large that the prostate is stimulated and the male ejaculates a little while taking the shit. Called a mellencamp because “it hurts so good.”
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The Elephant Trunk
A man goes to the doctor, absolutely desperate. He says, “Doc, I was in a horrible accident and lost my penis. I can’t live like this, you have to help me!”
The doctor says, “Good news, we have an experimental procedure. We take a baby elephant’s trunk, graft it on, and it works perfectly.”
The man agrees immediately. The surgery is a success.
Two months later, the man brings a beautiful woman home for a date. Things start heating up, and suddenly, the man feels a twitch in his pants. The trunk-penis is waking up.
As they are sitting there, the elephant trunk unzips his fly, creeps onto the table, reaches into the breadbasket, grabs a dinner roll, and disappears back under the table.
The woman is stunned, her eyes wide.
“That was… amazing!” she says. “Can you do that again?”
The guy smiles, wincing in pain, and replies, “I’d love to, but I don’t think I can fit another dinner roll up my ass!”
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Could You Vape Semen
r/morbidquestions u/thatcatinthecorner 14h
Could you vape semen?
If it was watered down to the approximate thickness of fluid, could you vape semen?
192 60 Share
BEST COMMENTS
DrDank7 12h
Great now you’re making vaping even more gay
445
1simis 9h
It’s a double negative though so it cancels out
115
What_R_YOU_Doin_Here 6h
I don’t think that’s how this works. If you are giving a bj and taking it in the ass at the same time, does that make you straight?
18
WillBeamon 6h
Obviously
33
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Holy Spirit Strangling Hookers
“Wooooo… I am the Holy Spirit! What you are doing is a SIN!”
“Nonsense—masturbation is healthy and natural.”
“No, I meant strangling hookers.”
“Oh, right. Tbat.”
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Happy Meal for Grown Ups
IF THEY MADE A HAPPY MEAL
BAREFOOT SWEET RED CALIFORNIA RED WINE BLEND
Babybel
GHIRARDELLI INTENSE DARK SEA SALT SOIREE ALMOND
FOR GROWN UPS.
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Handshake Alternatives: Docking
CORONAVIRUS (COVID-19) HANDSHAKE ALTERNATIVES
THE BUMP
THE BOW
DOCKING
THE FOOT TAP
de.gov/coronavirus
