Delivery Style: bait and switch

Bait and switch joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Phallic Symbol

    Me: “It’s a phallic symbol.”

    Blonde Secretary in the office: “Ooh! I’d hate to tell you what it looks like!”

  • Explain It Five Times

    A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender “Hey! Wanna hear a blonde joke?”

    The bar immediately becomes absolutely quiet. In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, “Before you tell that joke, you should know something. The BARTENDER is blond, the BOUNCER is blond and I’m a 6′ tall, 200 lb blond with a black belt in karate. What’s more, the guy sitting next to me is 6’2″, weighs 225 lb and he’s a blond weight lifter,” he continues, “The fella to your right is blond, 6’5″ and pushing 300 lb and he’s a wrestler. Think about it seriously, Mister. You still wanna tell that joke?”

    The blind guy goes: “Nah! Not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times.”

  • Third Grade

    A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in third grade. Who has the biggest boobs?

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    The blonde, because she’s 18.

  • Play Doctor

    My wife told me she wanted to play doctor
    I told her to take off all her clothes and lay down on the bed.

    I went and played golf while she waited for me to get back.

  • The Hard Disk

    Last night, my friends and I went to a geek strip club called “The Hard Disk.” Lame, you say? What if I told you they only charged $20 for a laptop dance?

  • The Difference Between Men and Women in One Paragraph

    The difference between men and women in one paragraph:

    A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other the woman leans out the window and yells: “PIG!!”

    The man immediately leans out his window and replies “BITCH.”

    They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road.

  • I Think My Nails Are Dry Now

    A man walks into a public men’s room. His arms are held awkwardly out to his sides, forearms hanging limply, fingers spread apart. He approaches another man and asks, “Excuse me, but could you please unzip my fly?”

    The second fellow is embarrassed, but feels sorry for the stranger, who appears to be crippled. He thinks how humiliating it must be to have to ask for help for something like this, so he complies, unzipping the first man’s pants.

    Next, the man asks him to hold his penis while he pees. The second guy is even more embarrassed, but does as he is asked.

    Finally, the first guy finishes, and the second man starts to put his penis back in his pants. “Oh, I can take care of that.” the first man says, blowing on his fingers. “I think my nails are dry now.”

  • Take a Clean Dish

    Two confirmed bachelors sat talking. Their conversation drifted from politics to cooking. “I got a cookbook once,” said the first, “but I could never do anything with it.”

    “Too much fancy cooking in it, eh?” asked the second.

    “You said it. Every one of the recipes began the same way – ‘Take a clean dish and….’”