I have a step ladder.
I lost my real ladder at a young age.
Deadpan joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

So, what do you do for work?
I drill holes in sheets of metal.
Then I use metal pins to connect said sheets of metal.
Riveting…

DID YOU KNOW?
Before Isaac Newton invented gravity in 1869, people could fly

Elmo knows better than to question a man who just tore off half of his friend’s head to wear as a hat. There’s no place for weakness on the Sesame Street.

The doctor said if i can’t find a new way to relate more positively to my surroundings, I’m going to die.
I’m going to die.
I need to know something: Is it “Yeehaw” or “Heeyaw”? I’m riding in my first rodeo and don’t want to sound like a total idiot.
My boss is like a fine wine. All I want to do is drive a corkscrew into him but my co-workers keep saying, “Not yet, let’s wait for a special occasion.”