Delivery Style: deadpan

Deadpan joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Funny That You Ask

    A prostitute approaches a guy. “Hey babe, do you want to have sex for $400?”

    Guy: “Funny that you ask, I could use that money very well.”

  • Her Kids and I Are Shocked

    I just found out my girlfriend isn’t a virgin.

    Her kids and I are shocked.

  • Prose and Cons

    I started a poetry club in prison.

    It had prose and cons.

  • The Tinsel on His Helmet

    My grandfather was highly decorated in World War Two.

    In fact, many people believe it was the tinsel on his helmet that got him shot.

  • Sick of Them Horsing Around

    I told my kids to stop pretending to be farm animals.

    I was getting sick of them horsing around.

  • On My Own Accord

    My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic…

    But if I’m gonna have sex, it’s going to be on my own Accord.

  • Your Whole Post Is Urined

    I hate spelling errors.

    You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined.

  • Always Pushing Me Around

    Ever since I got a wheelchair, my wife’s been so rude to me.

    Always pushing me around and talking behind my back.

  • It Made My Earring

    I went to a store where they use explosives to create jewelry.

    As I entered there was a loud “bang.” It made my earring.

  • Two Dead Dogs

    Last week, my girlfriend’s dog died. So to cheer her up I bought her an identical one. She was livid.

    Yelled at me, “What the fuck am I going to do with two dead dogs?”