Delivery Style: One-liner

One-liner joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • Top 12 Pickup Lines at the Masturbate-a-Thon

    The Top 12 Pickup Lines Used at the Masturbate-a-Thon

    12. “Doesn’t it seem strange to be doing this? I mean, without a keyboard in front of you?”

    11. “So, I hear you’re looking for a colossal jerk.”

    10. “Excuse me — I could use a hand over here.”

    9. “Doubles, anyone?”

    8. “So what time do you get off?”

    7. “This reminds me of Hands Across America. Only slimier.”

    6. “Are you finished with that?”

    5. “Good choice! The SuperSchlong 6000 was a Consumer Reports Best Buy.”

    4. “This is just a microcosm of life… oh, sorry about that — I’m waxing philosophical.”

    3. “Hello, handsome! I will be your father figure….”

    2. “Pardon me, do you have any Grey Poupon?”

    1. “Can you help me out? I’m blind — and extremely confused right now.”

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  • Two Kinds of Booty

    It’s funny how the hip-hop “booty” is different from the old-time pirate “booty” — yet if you have either of them, you can pretty easily get the other.

  • Preferred Seating on the Short Bus

    On my resume, should I be bold and include “Proven Methodology of Obtaining and Retaining Preferred Seating on the Short Bus” as an achievement? Or should I just list it with my other superpowers?

  • Alone When Doing Number Two

    The old song says, “One is the loneliest number you could ever do.” I don’t know about you, but I’d much rather be alone when I’m doing number two.

  • Stuck Up Cunts

    What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing.

    They’re stuck up cunts.

  • How Do You Get a Gay to Fuck a Woman

    How do you get a gay to fuck a woman?

    Shit in her cunt.

  • Childless Men Can’t Tell Dad Jokes

    Why can’t childless men tell dad jokes?

    They aren’t kidding.

  • A Blonde Doing a Handstand

    What do you call a blonde doing a handstand?

    A brunette with bad breath!

  • Stephen King Has a Son Named Joe

    Stephen King has a son named Joe.

    I’m not joking, but he is.

  • The Clapper and the Mime

    Does the Clapper still turn the lights on if a mime is doing the clapping?