Dude, you better come see this. Your wife is on a dating site
That lying bitch!
She is not “fun to be around”
Format: dialogue
Dialogue comedy formats, jokes, memes, and punchlines organized for easier doom-scrolling from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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What’s the Difference Between a Hooker and Jesus?
WHATS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A HOOKER AND JESUS?
WHAT?
THE LOOK ON THEIR FACE WHEN YOU’RE NAILING THEM.
imgflip.com
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The Egg Timer
This morning, my wife was in the kitchen preparing to boil eggs for breakfast. As I walked in, she turned to me and said, “You’ve got to make love to me this very moment!” My eyes lit up and I thought, “This is my lucky day!”
Not wanting to lose the moment, I didn’t waste any time at all — I gave her a banging right on the kitchen table!
Afterwards she said, “Thanks,” and returned to the stove.
More than a little puzzled, I asked, “What was that all about?”
She giggled, “The egg timer’s broken.”
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Jesus: How Do You Celebrate My Resurrection? So There’s This Huge Fuckin Bunny
Jesus: how do you guys celebrate my resurrection?
me: uhh..
Jesus: something cool right?
me:
Jesus:
me: so there’s this huge fuckin bunny
