(Lori Petterson) Like sands through the hourglass, so are the constipation-packed pebble-turds trickling from my butt.
Format: one-liner
One-liners, quick jokes, short-form comedy, and punchlines built for impatient degenerates from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Snap-On Tools should expand their line to include sex toys. They
Snap-On Tools should expand their line to include sex toys. They already have the name and all.
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Sure, a big penis might please the ladies a little more, but it
Sure, a big penis might please the ladies a little more, but it would mean a LOT more work for me when I’m by myself, and that happens WAY more often.
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The Nick Smith Theorem of Wanking: The amount of sex I’m getting
The Nick Smith Theorem of Wanking: The amount of sex I’m getting is inversely proportionate to how much my right arm hurts.
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I’m guessing the reason it’s called a “staff meeting” is because
I’m guessing the reason it’s called a “staff meeting” is because of that guy in accounting who always seems to be playing with himself while he shows us his presentations.
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Some woman in traffic yelled out her window at me, “You suck!”
Some woman in traffic yelled out her window at me, “You suck!” Well, duh. How do you think we careened off the guardrail and into oncoming traffic in the first place?
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If whores were given performance reviews, I’ll bet “You REALLY
If whores were given performance reviews, I’ll bet “You REALLY sucked” would be positive feedback.
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My co-worker’s brain fart was so big it left skid marks on the
My co-worker’s brain fart was so big it left skid marks on the back of his cubicle wall.
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I’ve been getting a lot of “but sex” lately. Women I date say,
I’ve been getting a lot of “but sex” lately. Women I date say, “I like you and all, but sex…”
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Ask all you want, but I ain’t showing you my Chanukah Bush
Ask all you want, but I ain’t showing you my Chanukah Bush.
