If I had a nickel for every lava-lamp menorah I sold this season, I wonder if that would be anywhere close to enough to pay to see Jilly G.’s tits?
Format: one-liner
One-liners, quick jokes, short-form comedy, and punchlines built for impatient degenerates from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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My wife finally got back at me for all those years of surprising
My wife finally got back at me for all those years of surprising her lingerie which was too small buy giving me a cock ring which was too big.
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If I had a nickel for every Rumination that mentioned my tits,
If I had a nickel for every Rumination that mentioned my tits, I’d stick them on my tits. I’ll bet they’d make *awesome* pasties.
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Word to the wise: When a longtime friend confesses his
Word to the wise: When a longtime friend confesses his scatological fetish to you, it is NOT appropriate to respond by saying, “I don’t give a shit.”
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Whenever I help my boyfriend get off by letting him watch me
Whenever I help my boyfriend get off by letting him watch me masturbate, after he thanks me I like to say, “Happy to lend a helping finger!”
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If you’re stranded at a cannibal commune and forced to eat a
If you’re stranded at a cannibal commune and forced to eat a penis butter and jelly sandwich, at least tell them you’d prefer they used creamy, not chunky.
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(Jilly G.) The best thing about a threesome is that if you do
(Jilly G.) The best thing about a threesome is that if you do something TRULY spectacular, you’ll have two witnesses there to corroborate your story.
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Apparently, to my husband “Happy Valentine’s Day” means “Yes!
Apparently, to my husband “Happy Valentine’s Day” means “Yes! I’m finally getting anal!”
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I thought I had a great name for my new line of vaginal pasties,
I thought I had a great name for my new line of vaginal pasties, but apparently “lipstick” is already taken.
