The thing I find so disgusting about airport bathrooms is you have no idea how many people have smeared a sheen of their semen on the toilet seat before you did.
Format: one-liner
One-liners, quick jokes, short-form comedy, and punchlines built for impatient degenerates from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
-
The great thing about being bisexual is that you can get revenge
The great thing about being bisexual is that you can get revenge on a woman who turns you down by telling her you were only hitting on her for a shot at blowing her nearby friend.
-
It takes a lot of effort to inflate a new love doll, but it’s
It takes a lot of effort to inflate a new love doll, but it’s worth it. The look of wide-eyed, open-mouthed excitement when you introduce your two ladies to each other pretty much guarantees you a three-way sandwich.
-
I’m not saying my girlfriend’s vibrator isn’t loud; I’m just
I’m not saying my girlfriend’s vibrator isn’t loud; I’m just saying her neighbor should know that helicopters can’t land on the roof because there’s no room up there.
-
Man, did I ever screw up with my Craigslist ad. My adventurous
Man, did I ever screw up with my Craigslist ad. My adventurous girlfriend asked me to organize a gangbang for her; now how the hell do I get all these Crips and Bloods out of my apartment?
-
If I wrote Star Trek, the Prime Directive would be “Face down,
If I wrote Star Trek, the Prime Directive would be “Face down, ass up.” Maybe that’s why I don’t do well with Trekkers.
-
Jesus, I’m not sure things will ever be the same between me and
Jesus, I’m not sure things will ever be the same between me and my girlfriend. I could’ve SWORN she said she wanted a squirrel necklace.
-
I’m not saying my boyfriend’s penis is small, but that’s only
I’m not saying my boyfriend’s penis is small, but that’s only because he’s probably heard it his entire life and I don’t want him to feel bad.
-
There is no “I” in “team,” but there are at least six eyes in a
There is no “I” in “team,” but there are at least six eyes in a Daisy Chain.
