When the ceremony's been over for hours and you remember you didn't take the baby out of the water after the baptism.
Joke Type: absurdist
Absurdist jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.
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Sneaking Into Your Girlfriend’s Room
When you try to sneak into your girlfriend's room at night but you accidentally go in her brothers room so you fuck him instead
Improvise. Adapt. Overcome
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An Anonymous Post
> been chatting with cute 14 year old girl
> really flirty and sexy
> now she tells me she’s an undercover cop
> how fucking cool is that for someone her age
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Bob Ross’s Paintings
what if Bob Ross was a serial killer and his paintings are the locations of where he hid the bodies
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21 Savage’s Unreleased Albums
21 Savage says he's sitting on two albums of unreleased music
Imma be honest that looks like a chair
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First Day at Domino’s
Kyle 🌱
@KylePlantEmoji
[first day at Domino’s]
Manager: oh and one more thing: don’t
fuck the pizzas
Me: haha
Asst Manager: seriously, don’t fuck
them
Cook: don’t fuck the pizzas dude
Me: I’m n-
Customer: that guy’s not gonna fuck my
pizza is he?
Manager: not if he wants to keep his
job he wont. -
A Tree Falls in a Forest
[tree falls in forest]
[doesn’t make a sound]
GUY IN CAMOUFLAGE: What the—
TREE: oh shit I mean AHHH!!!
